the end of 11.11.11

actually i have not decided anything. i can't decide yet. and plus i'm speechless. i'm down. totally down. today is the down day for me. how i miss you my dear. the old you. not the new you.

you know how broken my heart is? i don't want to go and just leave you like this. but what can i do? i can't stand to long to wait for your changed to the old one. i'm serious. i miss you. damn much. i miss everything about you. from the start until the end.

i don't even know actually what is going in my life. i mean my self. which is i'm too sensitive. i can't control my anger. i can't control my mind. i can't control everything. every second every minutes. i know you can't help me to control. even though i hope you can help in every single with my sensitivity.

i miss you. i have not finish with you. i still want with you. but what do i get? with my high sensitivity i lost everything. i can't stop to say that i miss you. but i have to. i have to go. i have to go far away. so that, you wont stress with me.

i know a lot of stuff you have to think. so i don't want you feel the stress about me. make it clear. we done here. we done everything on the 11.11.11. crying together. singing together. eating together. at the end. it will never happen again right? we cannot done it together.

after this you have your own life. and me too. i wish the best luck for you.

and yes the tears accompany me now while you were sleeping. i don't want to see the way you sleep. if i saw it, i would like to join. i have to stay away from it. i know i can't. but i have to.

i record some part you sing my "lagu kegemaran" that cum to our favorite song. but i can't listen to it now.

i'm done. i don't know what to say. the only thing i can say is i miss you so much